Too Funny

As you know, if you read yesterday's post, that I got a new Jeep last week.  The day I got it our IT guy, who is quite egotistical, was gone to one of our locations and was not aware that I had a new vehicle.  IT guy has a Jeep as well.  IT guy is a Jeep Junkie, nothing wrong with that, I am just giving you the details.  

Friday morning I get to work before anyone else, part in my usual parking spot and get in my office to start my day.  A while later the Wiz comes in, a lady in our office that knows everything.  And then the IT guy shows up.  IT guy goes to the Wiz and this is how the conversation went:

IT Guy: Did you see that Jeep out in the parking lot?

Wiz: Yes.

IT Guy: You know that guy that works upstairs and drives the Mercedes?

Wiz: Yes.

IT Guy: Well, he bought that Jeep for his son for his high school graduation.  He talked to me about my Jeep and he said that his son really admires my Jeep when he sees it so he got him that one for his graduation.  But they aren't going to do anything else to it like I did mine.

Wiz:   Oh, you think so?

IT Guy: Yea, we talked about it and everything.  It feels pretty good knowing I inspired someone to buy a vehicle.  

Wiz: I bet.

Keep in mine, I am sitting in my office listening to every word and knowing that she is going to tell him that it is my Jeep.  But nope.  She just let him think that Mercedes Man bought that Jeep for his son.  That kind of set the tone for the rest of the day.

Immediately I sent Stef a text message telling her what was going on, because I wanted her to be prepared for what she was walking into.  When she walked in, she made a comment to me about how nice that Jeep looks all cleaned up.  I told her that it does, but that it has manure all down the passenger side of it.  This whole conversation was held as she was walking one way and I was walking the other, so it was loud.  He didn't get it.  

Not even five minutes later he walks into the copier room, Stef and I were in there, and he proceeds to ask us if we saw that Jeep out in the parking lot.  Umm, yea I say.  He continues to tell us the same thing he told the Wiz, but he throws in, "Boy it sure would be nice to just be able to throw money around like that."  I couldn't even look at him.  I am shoving paper in the copier and shaking because I am trying so hard not to laugh.  

IT guy is just a pain in our arses.  He knows everything, I tell you what when I came back from the Cardiologist one day and he told me everything I should know about my heart condition I just knew that he and I are going to go round and round one day.  I have been dealing with my heart condition for 10 years, I know everything about it.  He, on the other hand, knows squat and he has no clue.  He thinks he is the bomb, he degrades women, republicans, and anything Apple (although he just HAD to have an iPhone).  If there are two or more people in an office he has to join them.  He is just annoying.  Everyone in the office knew the Jeep was mine, and he was just making a complete fool of himself.  

Later in the afternoon he came back in my office when Stef, Windy, and I were visiting.   Windy starts asking about that Jeep upstairs and saying things like I wonder if they are going to put a lift kit on it, yada yada.  A full second didn't even pass and IT guy was waddling down the hall as fast as he could to fill us in on that new Jeep.

When he finished and left the room, we couldn't help but laugh.  We were all laughing behind his back that day.  

Some people said it was mean of us, it didn't hurt anyone.  Not seriously.  He deserved it for thinking he knows all and immediately taking credit for that guy buying that Jeep.  We were hoping he would see us coming back from lunch that day, but he didn't leave for lunch.  Then he ran next door to get some food and we figured he would look at the name on the tag then, but he didn't.  He left that day thinking he was SO inspiring.  He left early or he would have seen me get in it and leave.

Finally he saw what was written about MY Jeep on FB.  He sent me a message wanting to know why I didn't tell him.  Geez, and ruin all the fun?   He said he just assumed it was the other guys.  I told him that everyone else saw my name on the tag.  He took it all pretty good.

And if this wasn't funny to you, I guess you had to be there.  Just think of the one know-it-all that you have to deal with, imagine you did this to them and it gets funnier.

I know for a fact that Stef is laughing again after reading this.  This is one of the best jokes I have ever pulled, but I couldn't have done it without the help of my whole office staff.  

What kind of jokes have you pulled?  That needs to be a fun monday subject!

Comments

[Pamela]

I hope he doesn't do something to your computer!!

[Stef.]

You are so right. I started my day by reading this and laughing. I loved every minute of Friday, this was the best joke ever. I'm sure this week will bring lots of smiles.

[Vicki]

GREAT ONE!

My joke: Last year Olivia had a sunburn. I went to town and got her some Corn Huskers Lotion. As I was putting it on her she said, "Mom what is in that stuff?" Something came over me and I lied to my little girl. My only girl. To my baby I said, "Ox snot" and I was thinking to myself, "Where did this come from?" But it felt good and I kept going. She turns to me "OX SNOT?" the lie continued to pour out of me, "Yes," I told my baby "it's from these oxen in China. A small village there raises them. They produce a lot of snot and come to find out that snot is good for sunburns." She is quiet for awhile and says, "Okay but Mom can we not tell Austin and Dad? They will make fun of me and it feels so good I still want to use it." I felt a small pang of guilt, pushed it aside and went on with my day. Later I heard her asking her Dad to put it on her back, and she reluctantly tells him she knows what's in it but please don't laugh it feels good. He gives me up immediately. We still call Corn Huskers Lotion Ox snot.